I want my Two Dollarism.

Well, I could blame the Loch Ness Monster, Big Ben/Parliament or Maryland Crabs for my recent MIA status, but that only accounts for 2 missing weeks, lets chalk the rest up to a mean case of the lazies. But I'm back, and will try to post more - and despite my attempts to kill Nessie with a hammer, he/she is still swimming around the Highlands.

While listening to my ipod on my journey, I discovered something new to love, something so awesomely funny it is found in a rare few songs. What is this? Well, I'm glad you asked. My new favorite thing is when a song unexpectedly has a 2 Dollar word. Prior to this, my favorite cheesy terrible song feature was the use and abuse of thunder.

Below you will find two of my favorite examples of what I like to call Two Dollarism. Yes, I know the expression is 25Cent word, but at the foundation we enjoy 2 Dollar Beer Summer, the "I want my two dollars" kid, and these songs are at least 4x better than anything 50cent ever recorded, so I'm sticking with it. If you have more examples, use the comments section and go down in the annals of pop culture history. I said annals.

Example 1 - Jessie's Girl - Rick Springfield

"Y'know I feel so dirty when they start talkin' cute
I wanna tell her that I love her but the point is prob'ly moot
'Cause she's watchin' him with those eyes
And she's lovin' him with that body, I just know it
And he's holdin' her in his arms, late late at night "

Ok, he just worked the word Moot, into what is arguably one of the top 20 Eighties songs. Moot! Not to mention, I love the way he says "I just know it", it sounds like a verbal shaking of the fist...I love the irony of having such a word like Moot in what is a sugary pop song.



Example 2 - Cleaning Out My Closet - Eminem
"Now I would never diss my own mama just to get recognition, take a second to listen who you think this record is dissin', but put yourself in my position, just try to envision witnessin'your Mama poppin' prescription pills in the kitchen, bitchin' that someone's always goin'through her purse and shits missin', going through public housing systems, victim of Munchausen's Syndrome, my whole life I was made to believe I was sick when I wasn't 'til I grewup, now I blew up, it makes you sick to ya' stomach, doesn't it"

Munchausen's Syndrome, really? Did Eminem just rhyme missin with Munchausen's Syndrome? Classic! Now thats a Two Dollarism if I've ever heard one. Although, to be technical, I believe Mr. Mathers was a victim of Munchausen's by Proxy, which is when the parent gets attention by making the child ill, as opposed to Munchausen's when the person makes themselves ill, but I'll let it slide this time. Send us your Two Dollarisms!