Random Pop Culture Musings

Louis CK is coming to Boston in a few months and friends have somehow managed to get a posse of folks to head out to see him. Granted he’s no Dane Cook, but it should be more fun than a “bag of dicks”. Our friend KMoore may just die from giggling if he uses that phrase, he simply can’t handle it. If you haven’t seen Louis CK’s special Shameless, you need to educate yourself post haste!

The Goon has recently informed me of a new disgusting pop culture/dirty slang phrase: “The Spocker”. Apparently, the Spocker is like the Shocker, but Spockier, and involves making the Spock gang gesture. This could be the weirdest slash funniest slash grossest term I’ve learned since the great Fuge Upper Decking conversation of 2007.

According to the Goon, (who really earns his name with this new discovery), instead of “two in the pink one in the stink”, the Spocker’s catch phrase is “Live long and finger”. Goon, you’ve really raised the bar on this one.

A pop culture confession, I spent 30 min the other day trying to find a good picture of “Burt” from Valerie/The Hogan Family because I noticed that the guy who plays the manager type in all the Stride Gum commercials was the same dude. While I thought I was the only loser to notice this, the Goon recently confirmed he recognized him as well. Burt was a nerd friends with Jason"It's Your Move" Bateman, unlike Bateman’s other friend, I think his name was Rick, who was a badddd apple, so bad in fact bad he got both a DUI on show and died of Aids. Ouch.

Speaking of sitcom sidekicks, I was never a big Hogan Family fan, but all this thinking of Burt made me think of Boner from Growing Pains. How funny was it when you learned his dad’s name was Sylvester Stabone? I’m still laughing. Speaking of Boner, I love when I learn that random barely famous people are related to other random kinda famous people.

Like, did you know that Boner’s dad was Checkov on Star Trek. I seem to collect random information like this, such as did you know the girl who played the blonde chick who dated Cousin Larry Appleton on Perfect Strangers was the daughter of Mr. Whipple the toilet paper commercial dude. I mean, who needs to know this? Me for some reason.

I also just recently learned that the lady who plays the socially awkward and pregnant cop on Reno 911 is the daughter of the guy who does the voice of not only Lion-O from the Thundercats, but also Count Chocula. Have you ever heard the audio recording of Lion-O swearing, it's pretty good.

Just last night I was watching 30 Rock Season 1 and decided to IMDB (apparently I use this as a verb now) Jason Sudekis because he’s really cute (aww) and lo and behold I learned that he’s the nephew of George Wendt. Now he’s even cuter to me, I mean is there a better drunken uncle than George Wendt? Things I like about Wendt are as follows:

A. how shitfaced he got on national tv during the last Cheers

B. my friend's brother saw him out at a bar and he was double fisting beers

C. his role as a gay poker playing rhode island lout in Outside Providence.

Speaking of Outide Providence and 30 Rock, they both share Alec Baldwin. When 30 Rock first came out I wasn’t sure what it was going to be like, but it sounded really bad and there was that whole confusion between 30 Rock and Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip. I saw an episode or two of 30 Rock and it just didn’t grab me as funny. However, my tivo captured it now and again on Thursday nights and I started watching it more regularly and it really began to grow on me. I’ve now since watched the whole first season on from streaming Netflix and have laughed my ass off, I think its arguably funnier than the Office, give it a chance if you haven't already -trust me any show with both Tracy Morgan and by my count, at least 3 Lemonparty references, is a winner.

Well, I think the rambling free association pop culture vomit session has come to an end – if you made it this far may God have mercy on your soul.

Quick and Dirty Oscar Nomination Wrap up

Best Picture: "Atonement," ''Juno," ''Michael Clayton," ''No Country for Old Men," ''There Will Be Blood."

Juno, really? I saw it, it was ok. The dialogue was entirely unbelievable and the soundtrack made me want to stick a gun in my mouth and blow my brains out. But other than that it was pretty good. I liked it, and I like the trend of the Academy giving quirky dramatic comedies more respect – ala Little Miss Sunshine, but I’m still shocked to see it here especially at the expense of other “indie” films – not that indie films really exist anymore. I really didn’t think that Once stood a shot at best picture, but seeing Juno there makes wish Once got the nod instead. I also much preferred Into the Wild.
No Country for Old Men was amazing, but until I see Blood this week I withhold judgment.

Actor: George Clooney, "Michael Clayton"; Daniel Day-Lewis, "There Will Be Blood"; Johnny Depp, "Sweeney Todd the Demon Barber of Fleet Street"; Tommy Lee Jones, "In the Valley of Elah"; Viggo Mortensen, "Eastern Promises."

I am psyched that Johnny Depp got a nod for this. He won’t win, but he did a hell of a job on this film. I also support their support of Viggo’s junk, however I do feel that legislature should be enacted that requires Viggo to maintain his hair like in Lord of the Rings at all times. I didn’t see In the Valley of Elah, but they could give it to TLJones for No Country, so I take their word that he’s good. He’s really become a great actor, good thing Al Gore invented him.(Actually they were college roommates). I haven’t seen There Will be Blood Yet, but there is no doubt that Daniel Day Lewis will win this Oscar. In fact, I think the Academy should just send him the an Oscar every 4 to 5 years and save us the time suspense. Although, FU Academy, I’m still pissed about In the Name of the Father being robbed!

Actress: Cate Blanchett, "Elizabeth: The Golden Age"; Julie Christie, "Away From Her"; Marion Cotillard, "La Vie en Rose"; Laura Linney, "The Savages"; Ellen Page, "Juno."

Ok, Ellen Page? Really? She did a great job, don’t get me wrong, but her character had in my mind one amazing scene in the film. Ask me about it, no spoilers from me yet. I think that Marion Cotillard will win this Oscar, unless they decide Julie Christie and reward her for years of good work.

Supporting Actor: Casey Affleck, "The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford"; Javier Bardem, "No Country for Old Men"; Hal Holbrook, "Into the Wild"; Philip Seymour Hoffman, "Charlie Wilson's War"; Tom Wilkinson, "Michael Clayton."

I predicted months ago that Hal Holbrook would get an Oscar nod for Into the Wild, I believe I said just send it to him now. He did a fantastic job and he’s old as fuck. However, up against Javier Bardem is a death sentence. I hadn’t realized that Javier’s role would be considered Supporting and not Lead. Hal, baby…I think you’re screwed. Casey Affleck, good for you! I wish I had a double burrrrger.

Supporting Actress: Cate Blanchett, "I'm Not There"; Ruby Dee, "American Gangster"; Saoirse Ronan, "Atonement"; Amy Ryan, "Gone Baby Gone"; Tilda Swinton, "Michael Clayton."

Amy Ryan for crack whore bitch of the year! Gets my vote. However, Cate Blanchet is nominated for both Lead and Supporting, I think she stands a chance here – she looks scarily like Dylan. Don’t factor Ruby Dee out, she’s a legend. I’m very happy to see Tilda Swinton get some props, she’s great in everything.

Director: Julian Schnabel, "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly"; Jason Reitman, "Juno"; Tony Gilroy, "Michael Clayton"; Joel Coen and Ethan Coen, "No Country for Old Men"; Paul Thomas Anderson, "There Will Be Blood."

Jason Reitman – again, more Juno outrage. Am I missing something here? The Direction did not stand out in this movie, not at all. I think it’s a fistfight between PTA and the Coen’s. I like them both for this nomination. This could really go either way. I’ll abstain for now – but I’m leaning Coen.

Adapted Screenplay: Christopher Hampton, "Atonement"; Sarah Polley, "Away from Her"; Ronald Harwood, "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly"; Joel Coen & Ethan Coen, "No Country for Old Men"; Paul Thomas Anderson, "There Will Be Blood."

I’m rooting for Sarah Polley here, even though she doesn’t stand a chance. Like her and have enjoyed her whole career – she’s really an interesting person, plus I think my friend Hunter would kill me if I didn’t root her on.

Original Screenplay: Diablo Cody, "Juno"; Nancy Oliver, "Lars and the Real Girl"; Tony Gilroy, "Michael Clayton"; Brad Bird, Jan Pinkava and Jim Capobianco, "Ratatouille"; Tamara Jenkins, "The Savages."

Ugg, I thought Ratatouille was one of the weakest of the recent amazing Pixar movies. I love Brad Bird, but I didn’t think the plot was original at all. I can see Juno winning this one, and actually deserves the nod. However, do I want to reward anyone with a stupid name like Diablo Cody?

Art Direction: "American Gangster," ''Atonement," ''The Golden Compass," ''Sweeney Todd the Demon Barber of Fleet Street," ''There Will Be Blood."
Tim Burton, 115%. I give it 4 for gore.

Cinematography: "The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford," ''Atonement," ''The Diving Bell and the Butterfly," ''No Country for Old Men," ''There Will Be Blood."

No question, No Country.

Original Song: "Falling Slowly" from "Once," Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova; "Happy Working Song" from "Enchanted," Alan Menken and Stephen Schwartz; "Raise It Up" from "August Rush," Nominees to be determined; "So Close" from "Enchanted," Alan Menken and Stephen Schwartz; "That's How You Know" from "Enchanted," Alan Menken and Stephen Schwartz.

Someone explain to my why a movie is allowed to have more than 1 song nominated? Then explain to me why that movie was Enchanted and not ONCE. Fuck you Hollywood. Am I the only one who saw Once? Grrr.
Although I’m not Pearl Jam fan, it’s a sin that Into the Wild was overlooked. Eddie Vedder should be outraged, he did an amazing job with the film. This category is rigged.

Documentary Feature: "No End in Sight," ''Operation Homecoming: Writing the Wartime Experience," ''Sicko," ''Taxi to the Dark Side," ''War/Dance."

Well, I saw Sicko and it scared me more than 12 Cloverfield monsters – so yeah. Sicko all the way.

Film Editing: "The Bourne Ultimatum," ''The Diving Bell and the Butterfly," ''Into the Wild," ''No Country for Old Men," ''There Will Be Blood."

I actually think Into the Wild stands a chance here, it was very well edited.

So here you go, what were your thoughts?

I hate the Ghost Whisperer

Maybe it’s because I’m a former catholic, but I feel like I must confess to my at least one of my pop culture sins. I love/hate/love The Ghost Whisperer.

I can’t justify it, but I will try to explain. The show isn’t very good, far from it actually. However, I seem to find myself watching it every week.

I was first trapped by the show because of my love of the Friday night post work nap. I’d find myself napping in front of the tv and then waking up with the GW already in progress and getting sucked in. What started off as an occasional one night stand with the GW has, sadly, turned into a full blown relationship. For this I have much shame. Just the other day I added GW to my tivo, MY TIVO, my sacred, sacred Tivo.

I think what I like about the show is how much it annoys me. I love hating it. My biggest issue with the show is that the main character Melinda (J. Love Hewitt, or Hugetits according to Dre/Goon) speaks to the dead but she never repeats what they have said verbatim. She always puts it in her own words, and its crazy annoying. I mean, come on now Hugetits, if I bother to defy a normal death and come back and haunt my loved ones, I think the least you can do is take a fucking message correctly. I mean, is that really so hard to ask? I’ll see if I can find a youtube clip of this, its sooo annoying.

I also hate Hugetits because she has a kick ass craftsman style house. I want that house damnit. I don’t understand where the hell they live that a fireman and some weird ass antique shop owner can afford this giant beautiful house, but some how they do. Let alone this town they live in, which is basically on some sort of hell mouth, is even more sickeningly sweet than that damn town on the Gilmore Girls.

Lets see, what else? I also hate her wardrobe, she’s always wearing these low cut blouses when hanging around with kids; I mean put a shirt on lady. Additionally, she dresses in this bizarre retro fifties porno housewife style, poofy skirts and slutty tops and don’t even get me started on her fake eyelashes and four tons of eyeliner. I will say her husband is hot. I’d like to have a job where I run a store that no one shops in but I can have a hot husband and a kickass house – fucking bitch! See, I hate her but I love hating her. She lives in this small town, yet no one ever seems to notice that the hot lady who owns the antique shop is always talking to herself in public?

Well, there is tons more about this show which annoys me, but really it’s me with the problem. I love the Ghost Whisper because I like ghost stuff and being a bitch. The end.

I May Never Kiss A Girl Again

I May Never Kiss A Girl Again...

I hope this isn't the case, but I foresee it happening this way. Why, you ask, do I say this? I'll tell you, the reason is that as of this past weekend, I started playing XBOX 360's Call of Duty 4. You may be confused, so let me explain.
I would consider myself a Recreational Video Game player at best. I'm not one of the people that wait in line the first night for a new gaming system or anything. And I think 500 bucks is WAY too much to spend on anything that can't drive you somewhere, or give you shelter, or let you watch baseball in high def. I've gotten my gaming systems well after they have come out on the market. Starting all the way back from Atari, I've had Atari, Nintendo, Sega Genesis, Playstation (my roommates), Playstation 2, and now XBOX 360.
Sure, I've spent my time playing video games, from hours of playing space invaders, to Mario Bros. and down the line, but I've never considered myself much of a gamer (except for the 3 week period that I was addicted to Everquest, thank god I was able to stop that, although from time to time I still miss my level 24 rogue). I tend to stick to the same type of games from system to system...Usually I'll play the baseball/football/Soccer games for a while, although I get bored easily. I'll pretty much play every Final Fantasy Game that gets released, although many I never finish, because I get bored before the end. I also have played the Grand Theft Auto series (I always have finished these, but then never gone back to play them again). One thing I've also played is either Call of Duty or Medal Of Honor. This goes back to the original PlayStation system...Again, I'd always finish these games, but then would never play them again.

You see a pattern...I get a game, I'll play it for a while, maybe I'll finish it, then I'm done. But this has all changed, due to one thing: XBOX 360 Live. My first foray into XBOX 360 Live came about because when I went to buy the Call of Duty 4 game at gamestop, I checked some reviews first. See, this is the first Call of Duty that wasn't based on World War 2. So I wanted to make sure people thought it was good. I read a few comments, and read that: The single player game is too short, but the multiplayer option kicks Halo 3's ass. Now like I said, I'm not a gamer, my game systems can go months without having been played, and have never played a Halo game, but I was shunned by the staff at a game store once for admitting this fact, so I figured if not playing the game garnered such a response, it has to be a well respected game...and if people are saying this is BETTER than that, it must be good, so I decided to go for it and give it a chance. I had my XBOX 360 headset, and was thinking of getting the XBOX live membership anyway, so why not give it a go. That was last Saturday...and other than New Years Eve, I haven't stopped playing since. Of course I've gone to bed, and to work, but this game is truly just so addictive, that I find myself turning off stuff I would never turn off in order to play it.
I mean seriously, I'm so bad at this game, and I get insulted and taunted by pre teens all day long, but I just can't stop playing, it's like I'm a video game massochist. The other night, I was being taunted so bad by the same player, I quit the game, I went back and played another, but I made sure that the guy wasn't playing in the same game again.
Now I've actually thought of some benefits that playing this game, during every hour I'm awake at home. One, hand eye coordination. Two, Money Saving, if I stay home and play the game all the time, I won't go out to bars, and drink all the time. Three, surprisingly I feel that if I play this game as much as I have...I will actually lose weight. I know, you think I'm crazy but hear me out. First of all, I won't be going to the bar, so thats tons of empty calories right there saved. Also, I've tried to play this game drunk, can't do it...so I know that I'll remain sober if I play it...And finally, When I get into the groove, I forget about eating. I swear to god, I haven't wanted to eat at all when playing this game, I just go and go and go for hours, not eating, drinking as little as possible to avoid bathroom breaks. I'm telling you, this could work.
So this is what the problem is...If I keep this up, I'll never have a girlfriend...I mean, sure, maybe I'll meet a chick from Korea that plays the game in some sort of a chat room, and maybe she won't actually end up being some huge perv named Skip from Idaho. But otherwise how am I supposed to meet chicks in my living room with a headset on? And even if I did happen to meet a chick, what are the chances that she'd want to kiss a guy who wears a headset in his spare time anyway?